What of Marriage?

Stupid people are smart sometimes.  Same sex marriage is headed to the Supreme Court this year.  The lovely but ignorant folks that oppose gay marriage have updated their argument, saying gay marriage is not in line with ‘natural law’ and as such, states have the right to ban it.  Because we all know that unnatural things naturally lead to other awful unnatural criminal things, don’t we?  Wait a minute…………. what is ‘natural’ when it comes to marriage?

Is it natural for a person to have many spouses?

Is it natural for a 60 year old to marry a 20 year old?   What if the 60 year old was the woman?  Didn't think of that did ya?

Is it natural for people of different religions or different races to marry?

Is it natural for people with disabilities to marry?

Is it natural for people with children to marry people other than the parents of those children?

Is it natural for free roaming citizens to marry inmates?

If you answered no to any of these questions, congratulations on your closed mind and lukewarm heart! 

A great many folks find many many marriages other than their own “unnatural”.  If we only knew what situations those friendly faces at the grocery store really went home to…  In the grand scheme of life, what does it matter if my spouse and I shop on the same side of The Gap?  How can a country so diverse even fathom a definition of what is ‘natural’ when it comes to a marriage between legally consenting adults?

Wake up call:  marriage is for more than baby making!   When can we ALL do what comes naturally?

 I’m asking…

Why Do I Smile?

Smile.  Avoid confrontation.  Follow the golden rule.  Be the change.  Try to understand where other people are coming from and don’t judge them for being ignorant a**holes. Okay try not to judge.  There is a Smith’s song that so eloquently asks “in my life, why do I smile at people who I’d much rather kick in the eye?”.   Good question Morrissey; good friggin question. 

Smiling has been said to be contagious and understood in any language.  So why not smile?  I tend to smile at people regularly, often without even thinking about it.  It is almost natural for me personally, to smile at people in passing when we make eye contact.  But sometimes, there quickly comes regret.  It was a miss-fire!  I did not mean to be friendly towards you.  You are not deserving of my offering.  I take it back!  Is it in fact better to not smile at individuals towards which we feel disdain?

Perhaps I was giving the sarcastic smile; the one that slyly says ‘I know who you really are and how you operate’, and I smile at you because I want you to know that I know.  Y’know?  So actually, smiling is good.  But wait!  If my smile is disingenuous then I have subsequently broken the golden rule and have for all intents and purposes, [POW!] kicked ‘em in the eye.  Sigh.

On the other hand, what if they didn't perceive my smile as fake, but as if it were heartfelt?  They received a genuine smile and with it forgiveness or the notion that I have taken the higher ground and truly believe that despite our differences we can be kind to one another and leave our judgments at the door.  Wouldn't that be grand?  I think I will continue to smile.  Will you?  I’m asking…

4 Random Things I Miss

1)  Notebook Paper:   Uh-oh pop quiz!  Can I borrow a sheet of paper?  That 3 ring binder double click at the desk behind you just saved the day.  How many sheets of paper do I owe to my dear old high school classmates anyway?  I miss handwritten notes and letters indeed.  Not to mention paper airplanes, fortune tellers, and tiny triangular paper footballs...  Notebook paper has what texting lacks.

2)  Incandescent Light Bulbs:  I'm green, I swear!  I understand the wonderful benefits of curly fry light bulbs and LED's I do.  But try those in an old school vanity bar and you'll swear you're having an alien encounter.

3)  Telephone Mystique:  I miss the days when I had no caller ID or Contacts List in my phone.  The phone would ring and I would haphazardly decide whether or not to answer.  Who's behind curtain number 3?  It could be anyone from my mother to a telemarketer.  Or perhaps even a telemarketer calling for my mother...  Who knows?  I sometimes wish I didn't.

4)  The Video Store!  Prepare yourself.  We are going to go to the video store!  This was not a disc dispensing automated ATM transaction.  This is an outing.  I miss the generically categorized boxes standing on shelves in stores decorated with cheesy Hollywood-ish carpet and cutouts.  I miss the browse, the find, the desperate hope that the new release you missed in the theater and isn't on the shelf, has just been returned and is waiting for you at the counter up front.  The production values of the movies were made glaringly obvious by the front cover of the box or the rental price.  And let us not forget the beloved FIVE DAY RENTAL!!!  You can spend quality time with this movie.  You can memorize the lines.  You can loan this rental to your best friend who will most certainly return it for you, on time.  To the clock I say 'be kind, rewind'.  Why does all the good stuff go away?  I'm asking...

Are You the Boss of Me?

I hope I’m my own boss.  The boss is (usually) the person in charge.  Nevertheless, I’m completely unclear as to whether ‘boss’ is a good or bad thing.  Bossy people, according to the inter-webs, are fond of giving orders, domineering, overly authoritative, and even dictatorial.  Yikes!  I don’t want to be that boss.

Image courtesy of scottchan at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

‘BOSS’ is also a slang term historically used in America, as well as currently used in parts of England (Liverpool) meaning awesome, cool, neat-o, or anything even remotely good.  Now that’s a ‘boss’ I can get behind!

The word 'boss' comes from the Dutch baas which means “master”.  Ergo the phrase “okay boss” loosely translates to “yes master”, which might be okay if you look cute in a genie costume.  Maybe.  I am however, neither a genie nor an astronaut.  I don’t want that boss.

Bosses are also most certainly bad in video games.  They are what stands between you the gamer and your next level of game play.  On the other hand, if you defeat an in-game boss, or perform any random real-life act reasonably well-ish, then you just may be living your life entirely ‘like a boss’. Check your local Meme or sketch comedy show to find out.

Perhaps I should ‘Act like a Lady and Think like a Boss’, but this begs the question: Who’s the Boss I should act like?

Can I really be my own BOSS boss, or is someone else in fact the bossy boss of me?  I’m asking….

Who Is Gen Clever??

To whom am I posing these burning questions?

Answer:  A person or persons with answers.

Perhaps an entire generation of such people has yet to be born...  I'm hoping she or they are here and simply have yet to be properly asked the right questions.  Or perhaps Gen Clever is the one doing the asking.

Image courtesy of FreeMediaGoo.com

Perhaps you dear reader are Gen Clever.  Are you a compass?  Is Gen Clever out there, or in here?

I'm asking...

Let's start with the BIG stuff shall we?!

Who, what, when, why, and how.  Right?  The important questions in life:  Who am I? What do I want to be when I grow up? When do I have to know by?  Why is it so important?  How much does it pay??  Decisions and questions and then some…

When I was in grade school I knew exactly what I wanted to be (an astronaut) and pretty much how to get there.  However, being as young as I was, I wasn't as thorough as I could have been in my planning.  It turns out that engineering is really hard, not to mention boring, and being an astronaut is more than floating around in a tin can pushing shiny buttons and drinking Tang.  Also, unless you look a lot like Sandra Bullock, you more than likely won’t successfully fumble your way home if you are the only surviving civilian after a space catastrophe.  Soooo maybe I chose the wrong career?

I can do anything I set my mind to.  That’s what my mama told me.  What she didn't tell me (or perhaps she did and I forgot to listen) is that money sucks and has a paradoxical relationship with happiness.  Money cannot buy happiness, but not having money can buy lots and lots of misery, on credit, at a ridiculously high interest rate.  I grew up with just enough to know that everyone else had a little more, but I was happy nonetheless.  Or maybe that’s why my life’s ambition was to get off this rock.  They never run out of Tang in space. 

I am definitely not unhappy now, but I can assure you that having more money would definitely not make me less happy.  My spouse makes twice the money that I do, but also works nearly double the hours.  So we bring home a lot of those freakish peanut pods that only have one peanut inside the shell.  (Same amount of work for only half the reward).  I feel like there exists somewhere a secret balance; a mystical percentage if you will, that allows people to work a realistic schedule and earn enough money to pay the realistic bills, maintain a realistic social life, and put away for those future days of retirement bliss; you know, realistically.  Who can do the math?  What are you waiting for?  When will you have this figured out?  Why weren't we told about this sooner (OR why didn't we listen)?  And finally how do we spread the message once the answer is found?

People are being paid millions to catch vermin and air their dirty laundry and bad habits on reality television.  I have no answers, only questions.  For instance, should I have learned to wrestle gators instead of spending all that time in college?  I’m asking…